One of my lovely coworkers and dear friends shared the 100 Miles to VDay Challenge with all of the school staff last month. The challenge is a Tone It Up Challenge and it's exactly what it sounds like- individually, we all aim to achieve 100 miles worth of exercise! Well, I've got 15 miles to go before Friday. Today is a much needed rest day- I really busted my tooshy yesterday in a two hour workout. Needless to say, this sensitive bitch is sore as hell today, but feeling great. I'm fortunate to be the girlfriend of a loving personal trainer who writes awesome workouts for me. I do extensor and flexor workouts about 4 times a week. If I can fit in 5, it's a great week. The work I'm doing is strengthening my core, improving my posture, and building my legs and bum. I've always had this dream of having a voluptuous badonkadonk, and while I may never actually be able to sit a cup on my booty, I have to say, I'm seeing some serious progress! That's the best, isn't it? I love when I see my hard work pay off! 

We've been posting our miles in a Facebook group. A lot of the women in the group are ladies I've never met- friends of Kristina's. It's been great watching everyone's progress and seeing how our work as a group is really motivating for all of us in the challenge. The thought of saying goodbye to the group on Friday once the challenge is over doesn't excite any of us. We've all agreed to continue posting our miles in a fitness group where we share our exercise routines and motivate each other to keep up our hard work. I totally recommend a group like this for any of you who have difficulty getting and staying motivated. Get some friends in a group and make the commitment. It's a new year and it's certainly not too late to start a regular workout routine to keep your bodies feeling and looking strong and healthy.

As for me, I'm going to try and get to bed early the rest of this week so I can get in some yoga before work. I'm certainly not a morning person, but I figure it's worth a shot. Everyone I know who gets up early for a morning workout swears that they have more energy later in the day and their overall mood throughout the day is better. Tomorrow through Thursday I'm kicking it into beast mode, (sensitively, of course) and I will do my flexor and extensor workouts in the afternoon. These 15 miles are no match for this sensitive vessel. Imma get it.

Enjoy the week, everyone!

It's a sensitive subject and it has to be addressed. The subject: self-love, the why: because it's at the root of all happiness in our lives, and the WTF: just bear with me please.

Today's post is inspired by a best friend who is in the early phases of dealing with a difficult breakup. Breaking up is never fun- there's never a good time for it or an ideal way for it to happen. Everything about breaking up is plainly a mind-fuck for all parties involved. This is especially true when your heart is rooted deeply in love and caught up in the history you share with that person. Or, when your heart is caught up in your vision of the future with that person. My friend's analysis of her breakup is something along the lines of "I sabotaged it due to my own unhappiness." One thing I have learned to be true, as cliche as it may sound, is that you will never be happy in a relationship if you are not happy with yourself. End. Of. Story.

In our society, if we proclaim "I FUCKING LOVE MYSELF" we're simultaneously admitting, "I'M A NARCISSIST." Why people believe this, I do not know. It's not narcissistic to love yourself and treat yourself as you would treat anyone else you love- kindly, honestly, compassionately, etc. Instead, all too often we end up pressing play on that repetitive, negative self-talk tape: you're not pretty enough, you're not thin enough, you're not this-that-and-the-other-thing enough. If you're hearing or saying those words in your own head, the problem is in fact that you don't love yourself enough. BUT, you ARE enough. I came to a crossroads in my life almost a year ago where I had to decide if I was going to continue down a path of self-criticism and self-dislike, or take a left turn at the corner of Wake The Fuck Up and See Yourself As Your Loved Ones See You. I took the turn. I walked the road alone for a solid 7 or 8 months. I had to do that to get back in touch with myself. We often lose ourselves in-relationship with another person, especially if we were never truly in touch with who we are in the first place. In that first moment post traumatic breakup- you know the one where your heart turns to dust, you try to gasp for air, and the world is on the cusp of ceasing to exist- you hear yourself say, "who am I without this person? I can't live without this person. I'll surely die without this person. Kill me." You probably hear yourself say a few other things as well, but these specific words are pertinent to my next point. Those words translated into plain English actually scream, "I hate that this is happening because this moment marks the beginning of a very necessary, emotionally-trying journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and self-love.....and that's fucking hard work." 

Hard work sucks, yes. Many people have that ^^ moment and ignore their own cry for help. Instead, they distract themselves with other people to pass the time- other men or women, other empty, meaningless bullshit that only pulls them further and further away from the answer to the larger crisis at hand. The saddest part about that is, those people won't ever be genuinely happy until they dig deep. People who fall out of one relationship to fall into another (of some kind) will come face-to-face with the same issues they had in their previous relationships. The cycle is vicious, stressful, and heartbreaking (for one if not both of you) every time unless of course, the cycle is broken and a change is made. No matter what the situation in life- you will never have CHANGE if you don't work for it. I want six pack abs- I bet I can achieve that by eating whatever I want and sitting on my ass all day, agreed? If you answered yes, you probably don't know your ass from your elbow. I know my followers are intelligent- so my guess is that you disagree. It's commonsensical, truly. 

It's so important to realize that the sooner you confront your issues, (and we all have them because we're human) the sooner you will come out on the other side of your heartache. More importantly, you'll come out on the other end of it with a new best friend- yourself. While some of you may be thinking, "dear GOD that sounds horrifying" I promise you, it's not as bad as it sounds. In fact, it's life-changing. 
When talking to my friend about her breakup and the selfishness behind it all, I told her that I, too had been selfish once upon a time in my own way. I explained that when I was going through my soul-searching process, I shut myself off from the world- you could call it deliberate isolation. I wasn't a good friend to anyone who needed me to be, including her, as her now ex-boyfriend was deployed overseas during that time. I couldn't take on anyone else's struggles. I could only deal with my own. I was selfish because I had to be- I had to learn how to be my own best friend because without that, my foundation would have looked more like an ever-growing sinkhole. What do I mean by foundation? Simply put, unconditional self-love is at the heart or foundation of all successes, joys, and in-relationship love you will ever have in your life. The unconditional part is the most important part of that sentence and I'll tell you why. We often say, "I love you unconditionally," when in fact unconditional love doesn't have any expectation, jealousy, resentment, or fear tied to it. I can't speak for everyone, but I speak for myself when I say I'm guilty of using the U-word tied to expectations and fears specifically. Of course I'm guilty of this- because no one (myself included) can love unconditionally until they have learned to love themselves. Think about it- if you're content with yourself, at peace being your own best friend, bursting at the seams with positive energy- how could being with another person (who's right for you, of course) change that and make you insecure? It doesn't happen when you're in touch with your soul-self, the "larger you," your spirit. 

My journey for self-love was tough and I should add that it's also never-ending...for anyone. Self-love is always a work in progress. My "I don't want to do that hard work, you can't make me do it" moment happened two days after my break up and coincidentally, in the emergency room. That morning I walked for the American Heart Association in honor of my Grandfather who passed away 8 months earlier. The day was filled with a lot of intense emotions, I hadn't eaten in two days, I was dehydrated, and I was very sick. In and out of consciousness, I had to be taken to the ER. Two bags of IV fluid and six hours later, I had unknowingly set the wheels in motion for the health journey I am currently on today. Test after test after procedure for months on end, I never got any answers from doctors as to why I was so sick. As we know, I landed in Deb's office and she helped me turn my life around in a long list of ways. We never see why the "bad" things could possibly "happen for a reason" until time has passed, lessons have been learned, and we have grown leaps and bounds. If I can admit this- it's true. I promise you.

For me, some days were much worse than others. The important thing is that I really dug deep and tried to find ways to be in touch with myself. I tried to do things that would bring me a sense of comfort and peace. There were days when I would turn to yoga and cry the entire 35 minutes of the routine. It made downward dog more awkward than it typically is. But, I pushed through it- I TRIED. I gutted my basement and made myself a little art studio, I began writing in a journal, I did energy therapy, I turned to all kinds of awesome self-help books, I prayed, I made a vision board, I bought all the guided meditation tapes, I spent all my money on a trip to Italy without the security of knowing I had a job simply because I knew I'd find myself there- and I did. The list goes on. Looking back on this past year, I'm in awe with all that I've pushed through and accomplished. The most amazing feelings come from knowing I am where I am today because I got myself to this point. I'm a healthy young lady with a new, insatiable desire to travel and change lives through sharing my story and promoting a healthy lifestyle. I'm a passionate, strong-willed teacher, artist, yoga enthusiast, blogger, nutrition geek, part-time art therapist, traveler, and free spirit with crazy drive to possibly live in Italy someday. While my vision for my life is ever-changing, one thing remains constant- I will always do everything in life out of love and passion and I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Life is funny and beautiful. Time has a way of revealing some very precious lessons and gifts. I always say people come into our lives as a lesson or a blessing- sometimes both. I know how to love unconditionally now. How could I not? Had we not gone our separate ways, my life would be so different. I never would have gone to Italy by myself, I wouldn't have my health, I wouldn't have this amazing TSL empire that I love and hold so close to my heart. I'm so grateful for everything I have learned throughout this healing process. My closest friends and family tell me that I'm not the same person I was a year ago- that I've grown so much. I have to say I agree. I'm living presently, peacefully, and optimistically. I'm living with unconditional love in my heart for a special friend who knew better than I did at the time. What a special act of love. I had and still have growing, learning, and living to do. As I take each day as it comes, I've never been more excited about what my life has in store for me.

If any of you ever get the chance to meet Cher, let that bitch know there IS life after love and even better, there's love after love. You just have to give it to yourself. You are strong enough. 

There you have it- The Sensitive Life lady at her finest: honest, passionate, raw, and unashamed...because I fucking love myself.

My favorite self-help books:
Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting: The Astonishing Power of Feelings by: Lynn Grabhorn 
Madly In Love With Me by: Christine Arylo
Loving What Is by: Byron Katie 

I've received some survey form entries from my followers sharing what they want to read about on my blog. One of my followers shared that they want to read about stress and anxiety management- so here it is! I'll share a bit about how I manage stress and provide other resources that my followers may find helpful.

Personally, I'm the type of person who needs to be busy at all times or I'm climbing the walls. Busyness doesn't have to equal stress or chaos, I just prefer to be occupied with things that keep me happy. My blog and keeping up with The Sensitive Life on social media has been a huge outlet for me throughout this healing journey. I understand blogging and social networking aren't everyone's cup of tea, but I encourage everyone to find an outlet of some kind that excites them and brings them peace. I love waking up each morning to emails, messages, tweets and the like from all my amazing, strong followers. It's been so great getting to know some of you and it definitely brings me joy to know that what I share has helped in some way. I created The Sensitive Life for anyone who wants to be a part of a supportive, health-seeking community. Just as much as TSL is mine, it's yours, too! Everyone is welcome to submit their stories, resources, questions, and health advice via email or any of the contact forms on my site. I will share what you share. TSL can be your outlet if you wish! :)

When I'm not working on The Sensitive Life empire, as I call it, I keep busy doing other things that I love. Sometimes we have to take a step outside of our comfort zone to discover that we find joy in new things that we haven't tried yet. For example, I love working with the Alzheimer's residents doing art therapy once a week. I never would have imagined I'd use my passion for art in that way, but I'm so glad I gave it a shot. Explore your passions in ways that you haven't, and you may stumble upon the perfect de-stressor. Or, try something completely new and unrelated to any of your current hobbies. 

Yoga is another big de-stressor for me and it can be for anyone! Don't let the negative self-talk tell you that you're not limber enough, coordinated enough,- you ARE enough. I did NOT make yoga look sexy when I first started integrating it into my workout routine, believe me. My rationalization for why I couldn't reach past my shins during a toe-touch stretch was that my legs were too long. Overtime, my body adapted to this new, fluid, graceful change and the motions began to feel so natural to me. You don't have to join a gym and sign up for yoga classes to benefit from this life-changing form of meditation. Did I mention I've never belonged to a gym a day in my life? I love yoga DVDs and if you give me wine, I might drunkenly admit that I spent $80.00 on Hip Hop Abs DVDs when I was home alone watching infomercials once upon a time. #Getabs or #Dietryin #Oops

My favorite yoga & exercise DVDs are the Gaiam DVDs. You can get all kinds of different DVDs according to your experience level, the type of yoga or exercise, etc. I've done my yoga DVD so many times now that I do the 35 minute routine from muscle memory. 

I've been really into resistance bands workouts too. It's important to switch it up or confuse your muscles if you're looking for noticeable results. Whether you like to walk, run, lift weights, swim, whatever- exercise is the cheapest antidepressant/anti-anxiety "treatment" around and yet, so many people don't take advantage of it! During exercise your body releases chemicals known as endorphins, which react with receptors in your brain that reduce feelings of pain, boost feelings of positivity in the body, and can even have a sedative effect. Who has ever said, "I really fucking wish I didn't work out today- I'm really regretting that workout" ..? Exactly. Even if your tooshy burns after a workout, you feel revitalized and good about what you just accomplished. The neuron receptors that endorphins bind to are actually the same neuron receptors that bind pain medications. Clearly the difference is that activation of these receptors by endorphins doesn't lead to unhealthy addiction or dependence. Research shows that regular exercise does lower rates of depression and anxiety (WebMD). I always feel a sense of clarity after a good workout. Exercise is my number one go-to when I'm stressed.

I had to include this photo on the right because while it also made me laugh, it's 100% true. Remove the toxic people from your life if there are any! Keeping negative company only brings you down. I'm not just saying that- there really is a science to it! We are all vibrating beings, giving off high or low vibrations depending on our mood. As such, we're walking magnets. Our low, negative vibrations link up with similar low vibrations that other people are giving off and in essence, we feel double shitty. Have you ever been around an absolute DEB(bie downer) and all of a sudden you go from feeling content to feeling your heart sink into your ass? That feeling is a result of your energy going from 
Here to here > --__
The same is true for keeping good company, of course. High, positive vibrations link up with other similar high vibrations. Yes, we call that The Law of Attraction. Always keep good company. What you put out there vibrationally and otherwise is exactly what you will get back 100% of the time! :)

Last but not least, I have to mention FOOD. What you fuel your body with is always going to dictate how it feels and how your motor is going to run. Eating foods that are highly processed or contain GMOs have a direct effect on your mental and emotional health. 

I have found some other great resources for ideas on stress management and will share them with you below. Check out my previous blog post on yoga and meditation for more ideas HERE. Also see my previous blog post on epsom salt and what it can do to relieve stress HERE.


Helpguide.org on stress management
WebMD- stress management: how to prevent and reduce stress
WebMD- tips, tools, and strategies for relieving stress/stress management
MindTools.com- stress management tips & techniques
Huffingtonpost- 16 activities that instantly de-stress 
MayoClinic- exercise and stress: get moving!

Life isn't easy. My theory is that it shouldn't be. If life is easy for someone, chances are they aren't really living. By this I mean that they're not learning from mistakes, hardship, and challenge that life often brings with it. Those who have seen a lot of life are among the strongest.

Too often we let the everyday stresses of life get under our skin- literally. The mind body connection is powerful. I'll bet if you took the time to really think about it, you could recall a time when stress or unfortunate circumstance made its presence known in a number of ways- breakouts, upset stomach, headaches, sleepless nights, you name it. It's so tremendously important for all of us to take that much needed "me time" everyday. Yes, I said everyday. Pay no mind to anyone who tells you that you don't need that time- they just don't know how to use it themselves. 

For today's post, I thought I would share some of my own "me time" de-stressors. It really depends on the day, how I'm feeling, and how much energy I have. If I'm feeling creative, I turn to my art and create. As an abstract artist, I find it s0o unbelievably calming to go wild with a box of pastels and charcoal. If I'm bouncing off the walls, you'll find me on the elliptical trying to find a balance between dancing to my music and not falling off the machine/breaking my ass. Or, you might find me doing a more fast-paced resistance band workout to some profane rap music in my bedroom. Either way, it's a spectacle. 

When I need to retreat to a place of calmness and peace, yoga is my go-to activity. I never really cared too much for yoga, as I always preferred Pilates. To be honest, I became fond of yoga by taking it slow- really embracing those "beginner" DVDs, and building my strength, flexibility, and overall understanding of this exercise before I started challenging myself. There are so many health benefits that yoga has to offer. Yoga can decrease depression, anxiety, stress, and mood swings if done regularly (Benefits of Yoga- Why Yoga is Good Exercise for You). Check out the links below for a peek at all the amazing benefits yoga has to offer!

Physiological, psychological, and biochemical benefits of yoga
Yoga Journal
Fight stress and find serenity

Like yoga, meditation has several health benefits. Yoga is actually a form of meditation- where the focus is on your breathing, posture, and balance. Meditation may seem intimidating to newcomers, but have no fear. There are all kinds of guided meditation CDs that you can purchase or even check out at your public library. Yes, you can find a bunch of guided meditation clips on YouTube, as well. There is no reason to be intimidated with all the wonderful physiological, psychological, and spiritual benefits meditation has to offer!

Meditation is literally a mind-body medicine. As such, regular practice of meditation promotes physical and emotional well-being. While meditation can be used as as stress reducer, research has also shown that it can help with a number of health conditions including allergies, asthma, anxiety disorder, cancer, heart disease, binge eating, heart disease, high blood pressure, depression, fatigue, substance abuse, and sleep-related issues (INeedMotivation, 100 Benefits of Meditation). Check out the links below for more information on the benefits of meditation and meditation techniques.

Mayo Clinic on Meditation 
7 Health benefits
Physiological, psychological, and spiritual benefits of meditation
Chakra Meditation 
Meditation for beginners 
Meditation techniques
Relaxation and meditation techniques